Skip to main content

If the brain-mouth filter turned off...

"Mommy," he asks, reaching for my hand as we walk out of the grocery store, "wouldn't it be cool if we had some kind of a hat that when you put it on your head, you start to speak all of your thoughts?" His eyes are wide, hair fringing the blue. He's letting it grow until spring (exactly 21 days away, as he explained this morning) and he looks shaggy and wild. Like one of Peter Pan's lost boys in sweatpants and a Star Wars t-shirt. We've just ordered a cake for his birthday party - celebrating 8 years at a trampoline park this weekend.

"Can you imagine it?" he asks, "if everyone could hear your thoughts all the time? Ha!" I love ideas like this. They pop out of his mouth in unexpected moments, little gems that generally begin with what if? or wanna know something? I hope his mind always asks those questions.

But wow...can you imagine it? A hat that turns off that brain-to-mouth filter? What would he hear from me, right in this moment, that I won't otherwise speak aloud? Probably something like this...

How many free cookies did you just eat?  
I'm so happy you still hold my hand. When did your brother stop clutching my hand without thinking? 
Look at her boots - I wonder if they come in my size? 
Didn't we just buy apples a few days ago? Why do we spend so much money on apples? I wonder if this face cream actually will smooth the lines around my eyes. 
Watch out for the car! Where did we park? I can't see the van. Did someone steal it while we were ordering cake? Oh, there it is, okay. 
Oh, how I hope the kids who say they're coming actually do come to your party. Why did you choose a Miami Dolphins logo for the top of your cake? Have you grown out of Legos already? We don't have gifts for you yet...I was thinking Legos...maybe not now.
Why didn't that mom respond to the Evite? Typical hovering mama, afraid her baby will get hurt jumping too hard. And just cuz I thought that, my baby will get hurt, watch.
Does your collarbone still hurt? I can't imagine if you were really hurt, like truly injured and far away from me. I would knock over a building to get to you.
We have that meeting tonight, the one about school safety. Oh, God, those children went back to school this week, bless them. It won't happen here, baby, don't worry. I wish you didn't have to go away from me every morning. Your little hand is so soft.
Jeez, we need to get your hair cut. 

"Mommy, are you listening?" Actually, no I wasn't. I tune out sometimes. Zippy's mouth runs constantly, and mostly in a stream-of-consciousness sort of way, no rhyme or reason, just many many thoughts and ideas and questions and recounting of details, so I dip in and out of listening most of the time. I wonder how much more is in his own head, if this is just the stuff he chooses to share.

I wonder, too, why Happy's words are so few and far between - one child who talks constantly, the other who enjoys silence. I might actually like one of those hats for Happy, just for a few minutes, so I know what's going on in his 7th-grade brain. Then again, maybe not. I remember 7th grade - most of those thoughts were better in my own head, as they are now.


* * * *

I'm participating in the Slice of Life writing challenge this month, sharing a small piece of each day, in an attempt to restrengthen my writing muscles. Read more about the challenge here and read other Slicers' stories by following #SOL18 on social media. 

Comments

  1. I love those unexpected moments from the mouth of a child. Thank you for sharing!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Aren't they great? Another favorite from this week: "Mommy, I think I'd like to live on Venus...if it wasn't so hot...and the air had more oxygen...and there was water."

      Delete
  2. I would be in a lot of trouble if I had a hat like that, but there are a lot of times I wish that I knew what was going on inside my kids' heads. The thing is -- there probably will be a contraption like this in the future. (Remember The Jetsons?) Ugh.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I told Zippy to invent it! But once we talked it through, he agreed it's probably a terrible idea. :)

      Delete
  3. OMG, this SO reminds me of my son, Casey! Growing up he had so many "what ifs". I wish I had written them all down (as slices?). At times they were exhausting but usually they were awe-inspiring.
    This is such a great slice...I can truly relate to those 'brain to mouth'thoughts you shared as a mom. I would really LOVE to have that hat for my kids thinking sometimes!

    ReplyDelete
  4. I love this - his thoughts, your thoughts, and the thought of no filter! Your lists of thoughts makes me think of my brain when I can't go to sleep at night! Teaching middle schoolers...I don't think I want to know what they are thinking!

    ReplyDelete
  5. I have to say I'm in Jennifer's camp...definitely wouldn't embrace the hat! But then again, what does that say about me?!? Maybe he's on to something after all...

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Ottomania!

I've been spending a lot of time thinking about ottomans. A ridiculous amount of time, actually, given the number of other things I truly should focus my thoughts on. I find, though, that when the world outside gets scary (and scary is a truly relative term these days) I turn to online shopping for things I don't really need. Actually, it's more like online browsing; I rarely purchase. I spend hours searching for, oh, erasable colored gel pens or standing desks or all-natural curly-hair gel or the perfect black sweater. (Yes, these are things I've fixated on over this winter; I still haven't clicked "buy" nor settled on any of them.) This week, it's ottomans. By the way, my girl  BrenĂ©  Brown would call this behavior numbing . I'm okay with that. Because online browsing is way less detrimental (so far) than chain smoking, which is what I'd really like to do when the world is scary. It's a way to escape, to daydream, to focus on things tha

Lost between books

This is kinda what the inside of my brain looks like right now...a big see of books that don't interest me. I'm in a restless state between novels right now, and it's really uncomfortable. You know that feeling when you finish a really good one and don't know what to do next? I needed a couple days to process the book I finished last week ( Everything I Never Told You , by Celeste Ng), but then suddenly found myself without a Next Book. It doesn't happen often (I usually have 4-5 books going at once, all different genres and types), but every now and again I get stuck in this drift. Nothing really interests me enough to invest money and time in. So. Weird. I've spent way too much time over the weekend downloading samples to my Kindle, reading reviews on Goodreads, and perusing the library reading lists. Me without a book is like a guitarist without her guitar or a soccer player without a field to run on. I just feel a bit lost, even irritable. I'm just