Wednesday, September 17, 2008

A bed of one's own

I heard an interesting statistic on the radio this morning: 23% of all married couples sleep in separate beds. And most of these folks say it has improved their relationship. Hmm.

We've all heard (or lived) the tales of spouses who snore so loud that the other can't get a wink. Or one spouse pulls the covers off the other, leaving shmoopy to freeze his or her tushie off all night. Then there are the toss-and-turners, the spread-outers, or the get-up-to-pee-5-timers. For whatever reason, at least 23% of couples have admitted to living a la Lucy and Desi -- don't you wonder how many others have not admitted it?

I can imagine that yes, sleeping separately could improve your relationship. I mean, when you don't sleep for days on end, you get bitchy, irritable, angry, irrational. I get mean when Big Daddy snores loud enough to wake me up -- I have been known to throw elbows and knees to get him to roll over -- and I punish him with snarky comments for days afterward if I am even the tiniest bit sleepy. (It's been tough in my house this week because of our head colds, which means I'm waking up Big Daddy when blowing my nose every 10 minutes, and he's waking me up with the snoring...I'll be in the guest bed tonight myself!) So I can imagine that if a couple has suffered through one or the other's sleeping issues for long enough, they will really start to dislike each other. Lack of sleep truly could destroy a marriage.

So then I started wondering, who's idea was it, really, that man and wife should share a bed? I mean, sure there are the obvious practical reasons why this is a good (and sometimes fun) idea. But realistically, don't we all want our own space? Can you recall the days when you would sprall all over the bed without worrying about clocking your sweety with an elbow? And wouldn't it be nice to get dressed in the morning without your significant other getting dressed right beside you?

I'll ponder this some more as I tuck into my own little corner of my giant bed tonight -- with husband spread out to my left and cats on my feet, leaving enough room in the center for the boy to sneak in around 3 a.m.


Christy said...
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TallGirl said...

The problem in my house is that our bed is sooooo comfortable (it's like sleeping on cake, for real!), no matter how bad the snoring/tossing/nose-blowing gets, neither of us is willing to go to the guest room. So at least if we're awake, we're comfy.