Skip to main content

Banana Zachary and other name nightmares

I had a nightmare when I was pregnant that I gave birth to a boy and named him Banana Zachary...and people kept mispronouncing it as Banana Daiquiri. Which, of course, would have been a perfectly acceptable name if I were a celebrity...

I don't usually love Babble.com, but every now and then they do a funny little list like this Worst Celebrity Baby Names diddy. Check it out, if you'd like to giggle at an innocent child's unfortunate parentage. Far be it for me of the unusual name to criticize anyone's choice of baby name. But really -- Audio Science? Pilot Inspektor? Reighnbeau? Come on!

Some of these kids will luck out and not really have to be taken seriously in their lifetimes because their parents are that high in the celebrosphere. However, poor Puck's child will certainly face repercussions as he gets older. It'll be interesting to find out if, down the line, while all the Toms, Joes, and Mikes in the world are begging to be called names like Moxie, Peyote, and Seven, will these celebrity children be begging for people to call them nicknames like Tom, Joe, or Mike?

Comments

  1. Oh. My. When we settled on "Padraic" there were so many other options we hadn't even considered.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Early in my pregnancy I dreamed that I'd already had the baby and we were trying to decide on a name (since it'd come so early, we hadn't chosen one I guess). But the baby could speak for some reason and was lobbying hard to be named Clown. I tried to explain to the baby that he/she wouldn't like being called Clown later in life, no matter how cool clowns seemed to him/her now. But would the baby listen? No way. But boy did that baby(s) have a trick in store for me...

    And I love Pilot Inspektor! That name rocks! Course, if I had a son his name would be Wolfgang so you can't go by me. :)

    ReplyDelete
  3. Oh no -- Clown really is a nightmare! That's awesome.

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

A boy and his cat

Our backyard is a decent size and backs to woods. Every time a visitor steps onto our back deck, friend, family, and neighbor alike, we hear "What a yard! You need to get that kid a dog!" Apparently this is the natural progression here in Suburbia: house + yard + boy child + dog = happiness. Now, it's one thing to hear about our need of dog from friends or family who know us, but coming from neighbors and relative strangers it gets a bit old. My first response is always, Why do you think so? Which makes people hem and haw because they don't want to insult me by saying what's really on their minds: Because you're depriving that child of a human sibling , and he needs a friend . One problem: We're not dog people. I mean, we like other people's dogs, and I often think having a dog would be a major motivation to walk long distances regularly and get myself into shape. But a dog is like a toddler who will never grow up. They are needy, and they bark and poo...

Ottomania!

I've been spending a lot of time thinking about ottomans. A ridiculous amount of time, actually, given the number of other things I truly should focus my thoughts on. I find, though, that when the world outside gets scary (and scary is a truly relative term these days) I turn to online shopping for things I don't really need. Actually, it's more like online browsing; I rarely purchase. I spend hours searching for, oh, erasable colored gel pens or standing desks or all-natural curly-hair gel or the perfect black sweater. (Yes, these are things I've fixated on over this winter; I still haven't clicked "buy" nor settled on any of them.) This week, it's ottomans. By the way, my girl  BrenĂ©  Brown would call this behavior numbing . I'm okay with that. Because online browsing is way less detrimental (so far) than chain smoking, which is what I'd really like to do when the world is scary. It's a way to escape, to daydream, to focus on things tha...

Grown-up words and what to do about them

We know our children are little sponges who soak up all our words, actions, mannerisms. They are often parrots, but even more often they are fun house mirrors, amplifying and exaggerating our own idiosyncratic behaviors until we cringe, laugh, or hang our heads in shame. Yesterday while cleaning up his toys, Sweet Boy got frustrated trying to put one of his train pieces together. Instead of crying or raging like he would have a few weeks ago, he threw the toy down and yelled, "Oh, fuck it!" Oh. My. Lord. The air was sucked out of the room. We were suspended in time and space, frozen as our eyes met. I took a split second to consider my options: (1) Freak out and yell at him---scare him into never saying it again; (2) Ask him to repeat what he said, because maybe I heard it wrong and I don't want to overreact; (3) Ask where he heard that word, stuff his mouth full of soap, then call the offending child's parent immediately (a la The Christmas Story ); (4) Ignore it so ...